In the heart of San Francisco, where the echoes of the 1980s AIDS epidemic still resonate through the city’s cultural fabric, a quiet, profound story of resilience is unfolding. It is the story of Daralt, an 81-year-old survivor who once served as a pillar of strength for a community under siege, only to find himself in need of a lifeline decades later. Today, that lifeline has evolved into a vibrant, intergenerational friendship that transcends age, trauma, and time, anchored by the transformative work of the Shanti Project’s LGBTQ+ Aging and Abilities Support Network (LAASN).
The Crucible of the 1980s: A Community in Crisis
To understand the man Daralt is today, one must look back to 1988. As the HIV/AIDS epidemic ravaged the LGBTQ+ community in San Francisco, the healthcare system was overwhelmed, and social stigma often meant that those dying were left without support.
Daralt, then a successful business owner, did not stand on the sidelines. Recognizing the desperate need of his peers, he committed himself to the cause with a ferocity born of love. He wasn’t merely a donor; he was a lifeline. Daralt opened his own home to those with nowhere else to turn, providing shelter to those whom the world had decided were disposable. When his friends could no longer remain in the city, he personally funded their travel, ensuring they could return to their families or reach the care they needed to pass away with dignity.
"Everybody passed away," Daralt reflects, his voice quiet but steady. "They’d have to go to the hospitals to die or fly home to die with their family… I helped pay for them to get there."
This period was a "dark chapter" in LGBTQ+ history, and the emotional toll of constant, cascading loss was immense. For Daralt, the cumulative grief of witnessing his entire social circle vanish within a few short years led to a slow, painful withdrawal from the world. The caregiver became the isolated, as the trauma of his experiences manifested in a reclusive existence that lasted for years.
The Full Circle: Receiving the Care He Once Gave
The Shanti Project, an organization founded on the principle that no one should have to face life-threatening illness or isolation alone, did not forget Daralt. In the late 1990s, when the silence in Daralt’s home had become deafening, Shanti’s volunteers reached out. They visited him, reconnected him to the community, and gently pulled him back into the fold of supportive programming.
This marked the beginning of a poignant "full-circle" journey. The man who had once been the sole provider of support for those in the final stages of life found himself on the receiving end of that same compassion. "It’s… humbling," he admits, acknowledging the difficulty of shifting from the role of the protector to the protected.
A Second Act: The Beat Goes On
Life, however, is rarely a linear trajectory. Following a quadruple bypass surgery later in life—a period that could have easily led to further decline—Daralt discovered an unexpected, creative outlet: music remixing.
What began as a tentative exploration of audio software on his computer quickly blossomed into a profound passion. At 81, Daralt became an electronic musician, crafting remixes and disseminating his work to a global audience via TikTok and YouTube. The transformation in his demeanor is palpable when the subject turns to music; his face lights up, shedding the weight of the decades.
Perhaps the most surreal testament to his artistic second act occurred during a high-stakes surgical procedure. A surgeon, having discovered Daralt’s music, played the remixes in the operating room during a brain surgery. It is a moment of profound symbolism: the man who once spent his youth helping friends navigate the transition toward death is now, in his eighties, filling an operating room with music that offers comfort, focus, and life.
Enter Libby: The Power of Intergenerational Connection
The catalyst for this recent period of growth is Libby, a Peer Support Volunteer with Shanti’s LAASN program. Libby came to the organization with a specific goal: she wanted to feel more connected to the queer history of San Francisco and bridge the gap between generations.
"Intergenerational relationships seemed exciting to me," Libby explains. As a young queer woman, she realized she had grown up without a direct line to the elders of her community. When she was paired with Daralt, the connection was immediate and, as both describe it, "seamless."
Their first interaction set the tone for their entire relationship. During a preliminary phone call, Daralt asked Libby about her orientation. When she confirmed she was in a relationship with a woman, Daralt’s response was immediate: "So you’re family." That single sentence dissolved the barriers of age and background, establishing an instant sense of safety and kinship.
A Shared Language: The Jam Session
The relationship between Daralt and Libby has since transcended the standard parameters of "volunteer and client." Their weekly meetings have evolved into collaborative jam sessions. With Libby’s background as a musician and Daralt’s expertise in digital production, they spend their time teaching one another, sharing stories, and creating sound.
"I never expected I’d be remixing," Libby says. "I never expected to connect over music." Their bond highlights the core mission of Shanti: to combat the pervasive loneliness that often affects both the elderly and the LGBTQ+ community.
The Broader Implications: Why Intergenerational Support Matters
The story of Daralt and Libby serves as a microcosm of what social services like the Shanti Project aim to achieve. According to the organization’s leadership, the LAASN program is not merely about providing basic needs; it is about the preservation of queer history and the mitigation of "loneliness epidemics."
Research in gerontology consistently shows that intergenerational mentorship can significantly improve the mental health of both participants. For the elder, it provides a sense of continued relevance and purpose. For the younger person, it provides a sense of continuity and a connection to the struggles that paved the way for current rights and freedoms.
Official Stance on Peer Support
Representatives from the Shanti Project emphasize that the "peer" aspect of their volunteer model is intentional. By matching individuals who share a cultural identity—in this case, LGBTQ+—the organization creates a space where trauma does not need to be explained or justified; it is simply understood. This "shared language" is what allows the trust between Daralt and Libby to flourish so quickly.
Conclusion: The Endurance of Community
In a world that is increasingly digital and often fragmented, the connection between Daralt and Libby is a powerful reminder that human interaction remains the most effective medicine.
For Libby, Pride is no longer just a concept; it is the tangible reality of sitting with a mentor who survived the worst of times and came out the other side with a remixing software and a smile. For Daralt, it is the realization that his life, having been defined by the loss of his community, has now been restored by the birth of a new, intergenerational family.
Their story is a testament to the fact that connection can occur at any stage of life. Through the Shanti Project, two people—separated by decades and life experiences—found common ground, proving that when we intentionally foster spaces for connection, we don’t just provide support; we create the conditions for joy to thrive, even in the most unexpected of places.
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